Compelling Memoir Reveals the Harsh Realities of Infidelity and Divorce – With a Surprise Ending
Tulsa, OK – Endorsed by Tony Robbins, Dr. John Gottman and other contemporaries, Surprised by Love (Franklin Green Publishing, May 2011) is changing the conversation about love and intimacy and what is really possible in relationships when they fail. The only book in the marketplace told in two unique voices living the experience of infidelity, the unfaithful partner a licensed clinician, Surprised by Love shows and tells unlike any other the harsh realities of infidelity and divorce, why and how it occurs, and more importantly, what to do about them when they happen.
Dr. Jay and Julie Kent-Ferraro were, by all accounts, a model couple. Both well educated, successful, and upwardly mobile. Jay, a highly trained professional with a doctorate in psychology alongside an MBA; he had a thriving national executive coaching and consulting practice to the corporate elite. Julie, a former Miss Oklahoma contestant and model, was a professional entertainer with a demo album to her credit and a highly regarded talent and performance coach. It was a fairytale courtship, redefining the boundaries of reality.
Success rewarded the family with a gorgeous home, comfortable lifestyle, and grand vacations. Behind the storybook appearances, however, the foundation of the marriage had cracked. Jay entered into a clandestine affair, separating himself emotionally from the family. When the affair was finally revealed, both Jay and Julie had to face the ugly reality of infidelity. Jay and Julie separated; shortly afterward Julie was diagnosed with lymphatic cancer. Divorce and a broken home followed.
Beneath the ashes of their burnt lives though, the seed of a deeper love never before experienced was birthed. Julie found herself offering forgiveness and unconditional love to Jay. “Each day I made a decision to be mature, responsible, and generous with Jay, the opposite of what my instincts told me to do,” states Julie. “I chose to love him from a position of pure grace, the way I had loved him for over ten years, instead of allowing his affair or the predicament change that for me. Anything can be forgiven once we choose to no longer live with the impact of something.”
Jay found himself responding to Julie; it was through her gift of forgiveness and unconditional love, that Jay realized his offense. “It became amazingly clear to me that I needed to reach for something beyond myself if I hoped to discover truth.”
Jay and Julie resolved to reinvent their relationship and their life together, one informed by the lessons of the past trauma, creating a sense of possibility and hope. With a lot of work and commitment, Jay and Julie healed their scarred relationship with love. “A person is entitled to receive from love only in proportion to what they contribute to it,” advise Dr. Jay and Julie. “Soul mates, what many in pursuit of infidelity presumably seek, are created, not found. True love has nothing to do with finding the ‘right’ person to love us; it is always about becoming the ‘right’ person capable of love.”
In the shadow of the Magic Kingdom, on a tranquil lake surrounded by their children, Jay and Julie once more exchanged their marriage vows; they are happier and more in love than ever. Dr Jay and Julie have not only lived the experience of an affair and divorce, but are willing to tell the nuanced truth about it without spin, censorship or concern for ego. “Affairs will either destroy you or grow you up, and which it does is always a choice”, affirms Dr. Jay and Julie. “The power of love is limitless and it is only within discovering that power that healing and relationship transformation is realized.”
Surprised by Love offers sage advice and wisdom for any couple recovering from infidelity or divorce, as well as those dissatisfied with their current marriage relationship and circumstances. “Relationships don’t end because of a lack of love, they end because of the death of intimacy,” maintains Dr. Jay. “There is nothing more powerful than defiant love that refuses to be defined by the circumstances it is thrust into, and instead, elects to act on principle, deeply held values and compelling beliefs to what is right regardless of what your feelings tell you.”
For more information and for an interview with Dr. Jay and Julie Kent-Ferraro
Contact: Julie Spiewak, email@example.com, #425-678-8208
6×9 Trade paper
Category: Relationships/Love & Marriage
Release Date: May 1, 2011